My Legions of Darkness

 

Join now, and wear your dark minion logo with pride. 

 

Some people have asked me about joining the Legions of Darkness.  One wanted to know, "So, Deb, besides getting a button, buying a shirt, and eating your sweet rolls, what's involved here?"

If you join the Legions of Darkness, your duties as a Minion are...largely ceremonial.

Until they aren't, of course.

Consider it as the not-really-military-but-possibly-militant equivalent of the National Guard:  You only get mobilized if (and when) I decide to conquer the Universe.

That's "Universe," not "University" (just in case my employer is getting nervous). 

Fortunately for all concerned, I am inherently lazy.  If I were to take over the World (or, heaven forbid, the Universe), it would need to be scrubbed, dusted, painted, and swathed in curtains.  This strikes me as far too much work, when combined with my day job.  So the earliest that a mobilization of My Legions of Darkness is likely to occur would be in about 2022, which is when I retire and might get bored. 

 

 

All Legions of Darkness...

 ...need uniforms.

With really kewl logos.

I'm convinced that's why SPECTRE didn't do so well. SMERSH had a similar problem.  Bad fashion design; lousy logo.

In fact, many who would seek control of the universe do not understand this key point: Marketing rulez, even if you proclaim yourself ghod-emperor.

But my Legions of Darkness will have spiffy casual wear. They will not need to wear camouflage (in which, face it, no one looks hot). They should wear the logo of evil proudly -- both because they will then get to rule something more exciting than Manitoba, and because we've got nifty logos.

So, I'm writing to introduce Dark Minions: official Legions of Darkness MinionWear.  Affordably priced casual clothing, bags, and coffee mugs for the discerning dark player.  If you attended Smofcon 24, you saw several members of the Legions of Darkness modeling MinionWear (and, may I say, looking just *fine*).

For information on acquiring your own bits of evil sartorial splendor (or, if you prefer, splendour), please go to my Dark Minions Store, or feel free to  drop me a note privately.(Well, of course it would be privately.  We don't start you at captain, no matter how g/o/o/d/ b/a/d/ evil you are.)

 

My Legions of Darkness are paid in sweetrolls. 

This raspberry-filled sweetroll was photographed brief minutes after it was frosted (by Mike Benveniste).

 

 

Sweetroll recipe (for stay-at-home minions)

Dark Minions Apparel & Stuff

100 hints for aspiring Evil Overlords

The Evil Overlord devises a plot

 

This is my sword...

...Berger des Chat  (Cat Herder). *


Copyright Deb Geisler, 2007. 

I really don't care that much if you snarf stuff from here, but why would you want to?


*It is a custom-made pattern-welded sword made of meteoric iron which my husband commissioned for me as a Valentine's Day present in 2003; the custom scabbard includes black star diopside stones (a sort of four-pointed star sapphire) and some lovely leather and bronze work.